At one point while screening Zombie Town, I wondered if I needed to be viewing it through the eyes of a child in order to bypass the increasing pile of leaps in logic and nonsensical plot meanderings that were weighing the whole experience down. Then again, the PG-13 rating suggests a slightly older audience leaving me wondering just who this R.L Stine adaptation is for?
Zombie Town suckers you in with promises of Chevy Chase and Dan Aykroyd, but don’t get too excited as the former was likely on set for half a day with the latter sticking around just long enough to qualify for his union health insurance. Even Kids in the Hall alumni Bruce McCulloch and Scott Thompson feel like they’re repaying a favour with this one and Henry Czerny probably lost a bet.
Between these lacklustre cameos is woven a limp story of a long retired horror filmmaker Len Carver (Aykroyd) about to premiere his first film in 30 years in his hometown which was renamed “Carverville” in honour. This quirky American burg seems to be populated almost exclusively by his hardcore fans with the exception of jaded teen Mike (Marlon Kazadi) who can’t wait to graduate high school and get out of Dodge.
But first, he must prepare for the big premiere of Carver’s film as he is seemingly the lone employee at the local movie palace run by the eccentric Mr. Landro (Czerny). Hoping to impress gal pal and Carver-devotee Amy (Madi Monroe), he attempts to screen the anachronistic film reel for her, but instead inadvertently causes a mini-zombie apocalypse when the reel turns out to be cursed and zaps the whole town, turning everyone minus Mike, Amy, and Carver himself into soul-sucking zombies (brain-eating would’ve earned an R-rating). Only by tracking down the reclusive filmmaker themself can they hope to save this town from the soul-sucking horde.
Honestly, I was kind of rooting for the zombies to win with this one. Our two leads suffer from a triple-threat of being under-written, tepidly acted, with practically zero chemistry to spare between the both of them. The world-building is ham-fisted, the direction is pedestrian at best, and the low budget rears its ugly head at every opportunity (the background performer budget seemingly only allowed 10-15 zombies on screen at a time minus the climax). Just dropping Chase from the bill would’ve been enough to afford a consistently sizable horde. As you may have noticed, his part was even important enough for me to bring up in the synopsis!
It’s a shame because a smarter screenplay and a more assured directorial hand probably could’ve made something worthy of a cult kid’s adventure flick worth seeing. The occasional inspired moment and amusing gag point to unfulfilled potential in what amounts to a third-rate effort that even Disney Channel and Nickelodeon at their lowest would think twice about touching.
Halloween comes but once a year and life is too short for subpar horror that can’t even manage the low bar of so bad-it’s-good. On your horror movie travels, do yourself a favour by skipping Zombie Town on the map and instead drive straight toward 1984’s Night of the Comet for your PG-13 zombie flick fix. Thank me in the comments.
3/10
Zombie Town can currently be streamed on Hollywood Suite if you’re a glutton for punishment